What happens when a horsemad Ould Wagon moves from Cork to Provence with 2 horses, 2 dogs and a Long Suffering Husband? Why, she gets a third dog, discovers Natural Horsemanship à la Française, starts writing short stories and then discovers a long-buried talent for art, of course…
Like many horse lovers all over the world, I’ve been watching with regret the steady decline of the original dressage ‘Wonder Horse’, Totilas. A tiny bit of me (a VERY tiny bit. The bit that gets overruled by the rest of me every time I see the double spur-jab at the start of the video below) does feel just a tincture of sympathy for Matthias Rath, though. No matter what he ever does with this horse, he will always be compared unfavourably to Edward Gal. I will never forget the tingling in my spine the very first time I saw his record-breaking freestyle with Totilas and I don’t think any performance by Rath will ever recreate my feeling of awe that day.
Like many others, I drooled over every Totilas video that was posted to YouTube. Whenever I was with my Dressage Ireland friends, Totilas always came up in conversation as we discussed his paces, his elegance, his presence, his latest performance. What got me, though, was the utter seamlessness of his downward transitions. How could he go from extended canter to collected walk, just like that?
Anyway, one day, the obvious question came up.
“If someone offered you Totilas, what would you do?”
I think I shocked all present when I said, without hesitation, “I wouldn’t take him. What would I do with a horse like that?”
My friend tried to convince me that I could learn from him, he could be a schoolmaster, but I knew damn well I would never be ably to ride one side of him and I stuck to my guns. I was fifty years old – what the heck would I be doing on the world’s Wonder Horse?
Since Rath and Totilas made their comeback, I’ve been wondering how my fellow horse bloggers would feel about this same question, so I’m putting it out there :
Imagine you have an incredibly wealthy relative who has been viewing your horse-career with fondness and admiration. He/she buys the world’s top horse in your favourite discipline and offers it to you – for YOU to ride and compete.
So for dressage, you’re being offered Valegro. Sigh…
This is fantasy, so we can even go back in time to and you could have an Equestrian Legend. Showjumpers, you’re being offered Milton. Maybe American riders might prefer Gem Twist?
Eventing riders, you’re being offered Mark Todd’s Charisma. Or the great Lenamore. Or your favourite present-day eventer.
Western riders, you might be offered the horse that currently the NRHA Open Futurity champions, Not Ruf At All, or another horse that you think is the best ever (showing my ignorance here, but I’m smart enough not to make a total fool of myself by suggesting names in a discipline I know nothing about).
You’re into Endurance? Pick your favourite star horse ever. He’s yours.
Carriage driving is your thing? You’re being offered the smartest four-in-hand team in the world. Do you want them?
I’d love to hear what you all think. Who is your favourite horse of all time, in your preferred discipline, and would you take a present of him?
The dust has well and truly settled after our anniversary weekend. Flurry is in great form, thankfully, but my fingers are still very much crossed that he doesn’t colic again (thanks to everyone for the nice comments here and on Facebook, Twitter and HayNet, I think I can honestly say that Flurry has a world-wide fan club). Our daughters have settled back into their lives in Cork and London, Tansy to prepare for a final gig with her classmates and the ED to commence two weeks of temp work and continue her job-hunt. It’s strange; they have visited us a couple of times but, this time, we miss them much more than ever before.
Missing the girls reminded me of a blog post I did just before we left Ireland, What I’ll miss about Cork. I thought it might be fun to revisit this post and see how accurate I was in the list of thing I expected to miss.
The first three things in the post were our neighbours, family and friends.
Well, that goes without saying. Of course we miss them. But I’m happy to say that we’ve made a whole pile of new friends here. Mostly expats, it must be said, but there are a few French people who I now consider to be my friends. I just hope they feel the same! Not only have we made a whole pile of new friends, but we’ve also been having a more active social life than we’ve had for years. I think that’s what living in a village does for you – you’re much more likely to go for a meal or a coffee from day to day.
The post continues :
Our lovely vets. I am going to have to learn a whole pile of new veterinary terminology.
Ouch, this one is a sore point. If Flurry had colicked back in Ireland, we’d have had a vet up to the yard within half an hour at the very most. There were times on Sunday afternoon when I wondered if my horse was going to die because I had chosen to live in an area where the nearest horse vet is an hour and a half away.
And then there’s the food :
My newly discovered favourite potato crisp, O’Donnells. They taste like they’re full of MSG but they’re not, so I can eat them, yum!
Yes. O’Donnells crisps. God I miss them. Granny sent us a care package last week with two bags in it and we had scoffed the lot before the evening was out.
Rashers, O’ Flynn’s sausages & Clonakilty black pudding. Boudin (a French blood sausage) is almost an acceptable substitute for black pudding, but not quite
Interesting… I don’t miss these at all. We have plenty of Clonakilty black pudding in the freezer, but I’m not craving it in any way. The same for the rashers and sossies. We’re just not eating fried food any more.
Barry’s Tea (future visitors take note, a box of Barry’s is ALWAYS a welcome gift)
Ahhh Barry’s Tea. I’m not missing this either but that’s because we have a steady supply of it thanks to our visitors. Well, some things you just can’t live without!
Chowder (that’s an interjection from the LSH. I don’t really like seafood)
Nope. I don’t miss chowder at all. Someone else does, though.
My Giant Mushrooms (sniff)
I missed my giant mushrooms (shaggy parasol mushrooms which grew in our old manure heap) during mushroom season and then my friend’s husband turned up with a huge crate of lactaires (milk caps) and I stopped missing them straight away. AND we froze loads of them, so we had wild mushrooms for most of the winter.
Chinese TakeAway
Oh God yes. I miss Chinese food. And Indian food. The French just don’t understand spicy food.
Going into town on a Saturday morning (another interjection from the LSH. Hey, whose blog is this?)
I don’t miss this at all (it wasn’t something I ever did) and I don’t think the LSH misses it either. He goes off to the market in Apt regularly, or to Manosque or Forcalquier.
Going to the rugby matches (but we might look into being French Munster supporters)
We’ve managed to see most of the Munster games via the internet (when we weren’t out having a social life), and we’ve attended two Munster matches since we came here. One was a Heineken Cup semi-final in Montpelier against Clermont Auvergne last year and the other was a Heineken Cup semi-final in Marseille against Toulon. Munster lost both times but they were both great matches. So no, I’m not missing going to matches, because we’re still managing to do it in some way.
Having fresh eggs every day (I’m tempted to get chooks in Provence… )
Yes I miss my chooks. But right now the LSH is trying to reduce his cholesterol, so it’s probably a good thing that we don’t have a steady stream of eggs to eat.
My two favourite tack shops, O Brien’s Saddlery & Country Clothing and Thoroughbred Remedies Ireland (the latter isn’t in Cork, but I’ll still miss it)
Another interesting one, in that I don’t miss these shops (apart from the lovely, friendly personnel in O Brien’s!) I’m not spending nearly so much on stuff for my horses any more. I feel that I have everything I need. Well, except for my new saddle pads with pockets. And the Natural Horsemanship style rope halter and lead rope that I bought recently. And the second hand jodhs I bought on-line. And Aero’s new fly-rug. And the new schooling whip. And plaiting bands. And wormers… supplements… Hmm, it seems like my favourite shops have been replaced by a combination of on-line shopping and visiting the local tack shop in Manosque.
Going for lessons at Skevanish – I had hoped to get back there before I left, but that’s not going to happen.
My lessons with Frank at Skevanish have been successfully replaced with my lessons with Alexandrine. I’m really enjoying the mix of stuff I am doing with the horses. One week we’ll do dressage, the next week, some Natural Horsemanship groundwork, the next week, Natural Horsemanship ridden stuff. Variety is the spice of life, after all…
Having just had major medical check-ups, inside and out, I am pretty certain I will miss dealing with medics in my own language. I kept thinking to myself “Imagine trying to fill this form out/answer all these questions in French.” Gulp.
This is was definitely a struggle initially. I was pleased with myself recently, though, I had an appointment with a doctor which we conducted entirely in French, even though his English is perfect. The last time I was with him, I struggled to understand his accent – he is from Mauritius, so he sure doesn’t have a Provençal accent – but this time I understood everything he said. Yay!
…. and I think that’s about it. Thanks to the internet, I’ll have daily access to Irish news, sports programs (ie rugby matches) and chat with my friends.
I have to confess that, at this stage, I pay very little attention to Irish news. I read the rugby reports and I scan over the lead news stories but I am finding them less and less interesting. Celebrities and politicians leave me cold, but I do keep up to date with the Irish equestrian world via Facebook. Chatting with friends – I miss this, despite Skype. Especially the closest ones. You know who you are.
I don’t think I’ll miss the gloomy air of morose pessimism which pervades society at the moment, although I will miss the black sense of humour which helps us to cope with all the doom and gloom.
I don’t miss it, but I do think that the Irish economy is improving and there is more of a positive feel about the place now. Or so Tansy says, anyway.
I don’t think I’ll miss our very creatively corrugated road surfaces, which have caused poor Jeepy to develop an interesting and varied array of squeaks and rattles.
Provençal roads are still better than Irish roads!
And, finally, I don’t think I’ll miss the weather, although I have to confess that a certain 22 year old who was living in Los Angeles in 1984 got fed up with all the sunshine and craved a soft Irish day (just smack me if I ever say that again, ok?)
Well it’s raining here at the moment, so I can’t say I miss the rain now, can I?
* * * * * * * * * * *
So am I missing anything that I didn’t expect to miss?
Well, yes. A couple of things. Some of these are a bit strange…
Believe it or not, our on-line office supplies company, Viking Direct! We could order pretty much anything from them, even our Barry’s Tea, and we’d get it in the post the next day. Sure, there’s a French equivalent, but I just haven’t got into it. I invariable end up doing an emergency run to one of the giant supermarkets to buy my printer inks, paper or envelopes whenever I run out. Costly…
Dealing with bureaucracy in my own language. This one is really killing me at the moment, much more than the ‘dealing with medics in my own language’ ever bothered me. We’ve just submitted our tax returns and I’m currently trying to get my trailer registered here. We’ll have to apply for our Carte Vitale (medical card) soon. Nightmare.
Our local Apple repair centre. You’d think Apple standards would be the same the world over, but they’re not. The LSH cracked the screen on his iPad and had it replaced in a local Apple-approved repair centre. It took them ten days, and they screwed up the aerial so it couldn’t connect to our WiFi anymore. He had a trip home planned anyway (when he collected our new doggie) so he left it into the local Cork centre, Atmac, and it was handed back to him, fully repaired, the next day.
My mechanic, John Dooley (near the Viaduct on the Bandon road. He’s great.) I never thought I’d miss him but I do! When we replaced Ole Jeepy with Jeepy, I would have loved to have him peer under the hood and assure me that the engine was fine. I’m still hoping that I haven’t bought a lemon, but she’s going well so far anyway!
The LSH misses the sea. He grew up near the sea and has always lived within an hours drive of the coast. He’s one of those people for whom the sea is restorative. Me, not so much. Mountains are my thing.
And I miss my bath terribly… we had a fab whirlpool bath installed in our house about twelve years ago. I reckon it saved me a fortune in chiropractor bills! Neither of the houses we’ve lived here in have a bath and I really, really miss having a good, relaxing soak.
On a sad note, there’s one person I miss very much, who I think of every single day, but staying in Cork wouldn’t have stopped me missing him.
My sidekick, my righthand man. I hope you’re at peace, Denis.
Late on Friday night, we said goodbye to our girls at Nice airport (sniff).
On Saturday, I went for a nice hack with MC, about an hour and a half. Flurry was in fine form – enthusiastic, but well-behaved. We arranged to meet the following morning, but her daughter Nini wanted to ride too, so we couldn’t fix a time until we knew what suited Nini. No problem, I thought, we’d be finished by 2pm at the latest and I’d have the rest of the day free to spend with the LSH – it was our wedding anniversary, after all!
My phone rang at about 8pm. It was Alexandrine. She and her sister were planning a surprise for MC the next day – it was Mother’s Day in France. MC was expecting to go for a ride with just Nini & I, but Alexandrine and her Dad, Georges, were going to turn up out of the blue and join us. Trust me, Georges on a horse is a very rare sight indeed. He went for a short ride with MC and the girls last month, but before that it was probably about 10 years since he last rode! The girls had planned a picnic barbecue down by the river Largue, too. Could I play along? And join them for the picnic, of course – and the LSH was welcome too.
I have to confess to a brain fart – I momentarily forgot that the next day was our anniversary and that I had intended to keep the afternoon free to spend it with my husband of 29 years.
“Bien sûr,” I said to Alexandrine.
I turned and told the LSH the plan. I also told him I really wanted to ride Flurry, because I still have unpleasant memories of the last time I rode Aero in a big group, so he would have to drive to the river and meet us there. He looked less than excited about the whole idea. Why, I wondered… oh sh*t! Our anniversary!
I apologised and he said no, it was fine, a picnic was a nice idea and we’d have the evening together anyway. We’d cook something nice and enjoy a glass of wine on the patio. All good…
The following morning we prepared a few things for the picnic and I set off to meet MC. She suspected nothing! I went to fetch Flurry in from the field and by the time I returned, she had been ‘given’ her surprise. She was delighted, in fact she told me that she had dreamt the night before of riding to the river for a picnic with her family but was sure that was never going to happen!
Flurry was impatient to be off and pawed at the ground while everyone tacked up. I was using his Cavallo Sportboots on his front feet, as I had felt he was a little cautious on rough ground the day before. I’ve noticed before that he sometimes digs after I put them on, so I took no notice of his behaviour.
We took the shortest route to the river, about an hour’s ride, and arrived there in high spirits. All of the horses were in great form – Flurry strode out willingly and was his usual cheeky self, attempting to snack from the trees en route. The horses had a paddle in the river, some of them splashed and some of them drank, then we rode out the other side of the river and found the LSH and Remy, Alexandrine’s copain (partner). The campfire was already lit and the picnic table and a couple of chairs were out – this was going to be fun!
But first, we had to look after the horses. There were plenty of trees around to tie them to and there was plenty of grass to be eaten, so they could have a nice picnic too.
I started to untack Flurry. He was unusually well-behaved. He can be a bit bargey and cheeky when there’s grass around, and I usually have to tell him off for hauling on the lead rope, but he stood quite politely, only making a couple of half-hearted attempts to nibble on some grass. I tied him onto a tree, removed his tack and his boots and left him to settle. He pooped straight away and started to sniff at the grass. And then he started digging and, almost immediately, unearthed a snake. A very tiny snake, in fact I’ve seen earthworms that were bigger. A slow worm, we deduced later on. MC carefully picked it up with two sticks and moved it to safety. Was that why Flurry had been digging? Did he know the snake was there? Surely not, I thought – the snake was so small he couldn’t have been aware of it.
The digging continued, on and off, and the first seeds of worry took root in my mind. There was plenty of grass within reach – why was he digging?
“Je m’inquiet,” I said. “C’est pas normale.” (I’m worried, this isn’t normal).
Did he just want to roll in the sandy ground? I untied him and brought him to what seemed to me like a nice rolling spot. He went down, rolled, stood up and shook. Better now? He sniffed at the grass, walked a circle around me and started pawing half-heartedly at the ground again. Despite the heap of droppings on the ground beside him, my brain was screaming the C word at me…
“Je pense qu’il a un colique,” I said. (I think he has a colic).
I’m sure that at least one person present thought I was being an over-anxious owner. I confess to being guilty of this where Aero is concerned, he seems to have a delicate constitution, but Flurry has always been my Mr Indestructible. Nothing ever goes wrong with him… but, this time, I knew he was not himself. Alexandrine and I listened to his gut and we agreed that although there was some activity going on, there wasn’t as much gurgling as we expected to hear.
I’ve dealt with my share of colicky horses. I’m a great believer in keeping them walking gently – it helps the gut get moving again and can frequently be all that is needed to relieve trapped gas. I started to walk Flurry up and down the lane through the trees. He seemed fine, strolling along behind me, not sweating, not kicking at his belly, not trying to throw himself down or anything like that, but not trying to eat, which is NOT normal Flurry behaviour at all. Whenever we stopped, he’d stand quietly beside me but then the digging would start again after a while and I’d walk him some more.
Wine was poured, food was cooked and served. I kept walking and walking, allowing Flurry to nibble at the grass whenever he wanted, still hoping that it wasn’t a colic and thinking that, even if it was, eating a little grass might help to get his digestive system working again. The LSH took him while I ate a piece of chicken, but my heart wasn’t in it and I quickly returned to his side. And slowly, slowly his symptoms became worse. He started making more serious attempts to roll, even while I was walking him. Now there was no doubt in anyone’s mind what was going on.
I’ve dealt with my share of colicky horses. I’ve seen colics resolve themselves in an hour or two with a fart and a big heap of sloppy droppings and I’ve seen colics going on for hours and hours before gradually improving. I was beginning to realise that we were looking at the latter, but I was still calm and confident that Flurry would be fine. I rubbed his ears gently, kissed him on the face and told him so.
Georges and Remy were dispatched to the farm to get medication and the trailer. By the time they were back – maybe forty-five minutes – Flurry was much the same. Not eating, digging a little, but occasionally attempting to lie down and roll whenever he was having a painful cramp. Alexandrine quickly administered Calmagine, an antispasmodic. Did I want to give him Finadyne too? No, I thought we would stick with just the Calmagine to start with. We loaded Flurry and Quieto (they are great buddies) and MC and I set off to the farm.
They travelled well, there was one ‘clatter’ as we drove along but I could see Flurry’s little face through the window at the front so I knew he was still up. When we lowered the ramp, there was a heap of droppings behind him – a good sign. I started walking him, hoping for an improvement but, unfortunately, he was much the same – the Calmagine had had no discernible effect. I was still calm, still confident, still sure he would be fine. Still in denial?
Mr & Mrs Endurance were there, just about to set off for a ride. MC told them what was going on, and Mr Endurance came over with his stethoscope and listened for gut sounds. He shook his head – very weak. Then he checked the heart rate – 65bpm, a bit high – and we took his temperature – 36.5C, a bit low.
I’ve dealt with my share of colicky horses, but it was never MY horse that was colicking. The reality of the situation suddenly hit me like a ton of bricks – Flurry was in real danger. My eyes started to well up and I shut down that thought process rapidly – getting upset was not going to help my horse. Mr Endurance advised giving a dose of Finadyne, too, so MC did that and I continued to walk Flurry while she called the vet. Our nearest vet is over an hour away, but he was available. He would be with us in an hour and a half.
I continued to walk. Up and down in front of the big hayshed. His head down low, behind my ankles, sometimes bumping against my legs as we walked along. Into a paddock, allowing him to nibble if he wanted. Allowing him to lie down, but not allowing him to roll. Suppressing any negative thoughts, telling him he would get better. The LSH offered to walk him for a while, but I shook my head. Walking stopped the negative thoughts from taking hold.
The picnic ride returned and MC brought them up to date. I think everyone had been hoping for a miraculous turnaround. Alexandrine asked if I wanted her to call the vet again, but I said no, he’s on the way, he can’t do any more than that. MC took Quieto home in the trailer, but she was to bring the trailer straight back, in case we needed it.
Despite the meds, Flurry was clearly in a lot more pain and was trying to lie down more often. I stayed in the paddock with him, so that if he did go down suddenly he would have a nice grassy bed underneath him rather than the bare stony ground in front of the hayshed. We walked down to the bottom of the field and he lay down with a sigh. This time, he didn’t get up again. After a moment, he stretched out on his side and lay still.
I’ve dealt with my share of colicky horses, but I had never seen one do this before. It crossed my mind that this might be the end. I sat down beside him, caressing his head, smoothing his forelock, still telling him he would be ok. Whatever it takes, we’ll do it, I promised him. The LSH stood beside me and we waited.
After a few minutes, Alexandrine joined us and called the vet. Should we get him up? No, he said, if he’s calm leave him there. Should we give him more medication? No, hold off, he would be with us in half an hour. I asked her where was the nearest clinic if surgery was necessary. Aix-en-Provence – just over an hour away, not too bad.
The three of us sat together and waited. Mr and Mrs Endurance came back from their ride and joined us, their horses grazing peacefully nearby. I like to think that Flurry felt safer with his friends around. Mr Endurance listened for gut sounds again, and shook his head. Nothing. I blinked back the tears that were threatening and gently stroked my little horse’s head again. Don’t think those thoughts…
All five of us sat there, watching rain clouds sweep across the distant mountains, waiting for the vet to arrive. Flurry stayed where he was. Sometimes he sat up, just to lie back again. Sometimes his breathing was loud, laboured, almost a groan. Sometimes it was so faint that I found myself watching his flanks to make sure they were still moving. Alex and the Endurances talked quietly among themselves but I couldn’t speak, I was too busy trying desperately to stop myself from imagining a future without Flurry. He’s only ten – we were supposed to grow old and decrepit together, but now I found myself wondering if this would happen.
MC arrived back with the trailer and truly thought that Flurry was gone as she saw us all sitting there, the little dun horse stretched out on the ground beside us. She rushed into the field, her question plain on her face.
“He’s still breathing,” I said.
Now there were six of us, waiting and watching. I’ve dealt with my share of colicky horses, but it’s never been my horse that was colicking and I never realised just how important moral support is. We didn’t talk, but every single one of us was willing Flurry to pull through.
The rain clouds drew closer; the vet was half an hour late by now. A few raindrops fell. I was worried that Flurry would be chilled if it started to rain heavily, so I suggested we try to get him up and bring him into a stable. We urged him up, and he stood with a swish of his tail and a fart. Sometimes a fart is a good sign…
I led him up to the barn and MC started to bed down a stable for him while I walked him around. And then he hauled on the lead rope as he towed me towards a particularly tasty looking clump of grass. Did I dare to hope?
I led him into the stable and MC came in with a bucket to clean out the automatic water bowl. Flurry shoved his head into the bucket, looking for food. We all stood and watched him. He was alert, interested, sniffing at the straw, checking the manger for scraps of grain. Had a miracle happened? People started to smile again, but not me…
I’ve dealt with my share of colicky horses and the only one we lost was one who had a sudden improvement after hours of colic. We all thought she had turned a corner, but in fact her gut had ruptured. This relieved the colic pain, but she was dead from peritonitis by morning. I could not get this out of my head as I looked at my normal, perky, cheeky Flurry mugging Mrs Endurance while he looked for carrots. Even when the vet came and did a manual examination and pronounced Flurry as slightly constipated but torsion-free, I still feared the worst. But if indeed his gut had ruptured, there was nothing we could do now.
Everyone agreed that the best thing for Flurry was to stay in the grass paddock overnight, so Aero and MoMo were brought up to keep him company. As the LSH and I left some time later, Flurry was leading the other two in a gallop around the paddock. How could this be the same horse who had spent more than an hour stretched on his side, looking like he was at death’s door?
I was back a couple of hours later to check up on him. He was fine. Alexandrine checked him just before midnight and texted me, très bien. The same the following day and the same at 5am the next morning, when I went up to check him after lying awake worrying for an hour. My little yellow horse was truly out of danger, after giving me what was very definitely the worst anniversary surprise ever. I’m praying that there won’t be a recurrence, but I know it’s a possibility.
I have a lucky four-leaved clover that Alexandrine gave me last week – I think it helped on Sunday. If I hadn’t gone on the picnic ride, or if I had taken Aero instead of Flurry, he would have colicked all by himself at the farm and we would almost certainly have been looking at a different outcome. I just hope our luck holds.
Thanks to the LSH for the ‘picnic’ photos. I was aware of him taking them at the time and it did cross my mind that I would never want to see them but, thankfully, all was well in the end and the photos help to tell the story.

